After 2 hours of sleep last night you would think I would be dragging my limp body across the floor, shredding my fingers and nails on the concrete until they’re nothing but chunks of raw, bleeding, mince meat, trying to run all of the errands I need to do today. But surprisingly I’m wide awake! So I’m taking a small moment out of my busy day to write this as I eat an extremely late lunch, consisting of crackers, dip and wine, because it’s Friday and there was nothing else in the fridge anyway (that’s marriage material right there!).
Let’s just start with what’s missing in my life. 1: My own house. Which I am going to get in the near future because I’m a determined little son-of-a-bitch. 2: Sex. Yes, it’s true, I lied to you guys in an earlier post. Why? No reason besides the fact that sex sells and I say a lot of random shit when I’m drinking wine. Yes I have money, love, family, friends (always looking for more though), purpose, determination, goals and happiness. So my sex situation is lacking, or was lacking (yep, I’m going to talk about it, you got me). After having a great afternoon drinking wine, eating dumplings and chatting about anything and everything with “Alana” (hopefully this friendship sticks, she’s a great girl!) I met up with “Max” after. Conversation was pleasant (for lack of a better word), although sometimes it felt a little like he was trying to sell me something, but when he smiled or laughed that’s what hooked me in. Not when he talked about money, I have money, I don’t give a shit if you do. But good for you for making a successful life for yourself! As long as you’re happy doing it. So we banged (yes I’m using the word bang). I’m taking a secret satisfaction in the fact that nobody but me (and you guys) know that I banged a cute younger boy. Now I’m going to be brutally honest (with myself and you), he was the third person that I have had sex with in (drumroll please) my life. You see, I’m not easy. I’m the complete opposite of easy! You want to have sex with me? Join the queue, there’s only one ticket and it’s protected by 20 Navy officials, the Loch Ness Monster, a swarm of kung fu masters and a tiger named Edward (because who wouldn’t name a tiger Edward). So last night I gave my protectors the night off and cleared all expectations from my mind. Sure I paused a couple of times wondering what the fuck was I doing because I honestly thought I would’ve at least been a bit drunk to be in bed with a guy that I technically just met (still can’t remember how we met, damn) but I wanted to, so I did! And it was good! You would think I would’ve said amazing, mind blowing or even just great. But he could’ve offered me a drink when we got to his house, maybe even danced or something equally stupid to relax and let me just say; guy needs to slow down a bit! But oh well, I was happy after, even fist bumping him (which was new, and funny) and I still am happy!
So after that little shindig I’ve decided I want a “bang buddy”. Someone I just like, can have a nice conversation with over a couple of drinks, even a coffee or a bite to eat, maybe even play a game of tennis, whatever, just friendly shit, then go home and bang. I want friendship and sex with no chance of love (I don’t have time for that shit). Will it be with Max? I’d like to, he’s nice, easy to talk to, not to mention easy on the eyes and I like him. I don’t have any feelings of love with him either so that’s a bonus! But if he doesn’t text me again, then there’ll be someone else along the way. I’m no Scandinavian after all! And it will not be with a taxi driver, you guys need to stop asking a girl out just because she was friendly or beautiful (thanks cab driver last night but this is happening too much to me). So is it too much to ask? I don’t think so! Maybe this is just my way of filling a void that’s deep inside of me (unintentional innuendo!) Or maybe I want to do this because of my “do whatever I want” new years resolution. After all, a girl has needs!